Because of you...

It's amazing how two people can be present and walk away with two completely different views. It wasn't until 2014 that I truly understood what you held in your heart. How I wish you knew what was in mine and maybe I could've helped heal yours. 

I asked you to write a letter to parents but you somehow wrote a letter to me, and it was then that I learned what you'd been carrying.

You thought it was all because of you and I thought it was all because of you but the "it's" couldn't be more different.

 For 34 years, your heart thought that because of you:

The coffee was made

The cup was poured

The cup sat on the counter

Your back was turned

The cup was spilled

The heat existed

The holding happened

The clothes melted

The skin melted too

The hospital stay was necessary

The healing was delayed

The mask and bodysuit were worn

The names were called

The teasing occurred

Oh, but little did you realize, my heart said it was because of you that:

I was a fighter from the beginning, born with a nuchal cord but with my hands placed ever so perfect between it and my throat

I was born curious and liked to explore

I wasn’t alone when it happened, I could’ve suffered so much more

I had someone to hold me with love until help came

I wasn’t lonely- when they placed me in that hospital, you stayed and never left my side

It was because of you

That I healed- your faith, wisdom, care, and song – you asked to take over my beside care and spoke to my body, the nurse said, “I know what you’re doing, keep doing it, it’s working”

I wasn’t afraid- when I had to wear my compression vest and “face sling”, you said it was ok to go out, to be a child, to experience life

I learned beauty was more than a physical state but more so a state of the heart

I walk with my head up and back straight – you said if I kept walking like I wanted to feel that my mind would catch up to the depth of my hearts desires

I’m unafraid to try, fail and try again

I learned that I’m me- when I was afraid to be, you reminded me daily that different was good, that I’m simply unique

So yes, it is because of you!

It’s because of you that now I see my scars as beauty marks and that I vow to help children find the strength in their scars.

Thank you, Mom, it truly is because of you

Happy Mother’s Day to my Mom and to all the Mom’s who blamed themselves but for whom today my heart’s desire is that you now begin to see the blessings in the midst of this journey. Children are more resilient than many realize and they’re just waiting for permission to see their differences as divine blessings.